I'm a good media designer and with that a decent website designer. But you see my current biggest frustration in life is that I live with a UI designer.

Kevin is amazing at what he does. My biased little love struck mind isn't the only one that thinks so, hence he works at Google on Gmail among other accomplishments. He gets asked his advice/opinion by more than just little old me.

On the flip side: WHY DO I LIVE WITH A UI DESIGNER????

Okay, got that out. I feel better. His advice and help is making my new website better and better. And I'm grateful that he gives the advice since its hard to be critical to the face of someone you love. Its just that I really really want to move on to the next stage of my project. PLEASE!!!

*sighs* okay, back to work.

Kevin and I both received "Picture of the Week" awards for photographing each other last week!

left photos by Rachel, right photos by Kevin
(click on photo to see enlargement)

My NY drivers license expires on my bday this Saturday. I have known this for a while and that I need to be a legal California resident, I just haven't done it. I think I'm such a gypsy that this is an odd concept to grasp. Since graduating from high school I have lived in 3 other states (PA, MA, NH) besides New York, but it has always been either educational, or a short enough stay (3 months) that I didn't need residency.

Now that I'm in CA with no real plans to leave right away, I suppose its time to get to that CA license thing. So now I'm studying for my written exam. That feels so very weird - I haven't done this since I was 16.

Okay California driving law - Here I Come!!!

This is last week, but I still feel the need to post it. I found this quote on In Passing:

"His phrasing is weird, it's offbeat. He's not pausing at the commas. Hear that? Wait a minute... Dude, he's pausing at the big words." --A girl watching Bush's press conference on the TV in the lobby of my hotel.

So I had my 4th breast exam in 2 months today. I'm happy to say it will be the final one for a while. I finally went to a wonderful specialist and we did an ultrasound on a couple of different areas that she had some questions about.

The ultrasound showed that the areas of concern were very simply normal fatty deposits that were inside the breast tissue. These fatty deposits were thicker in these areas than in the rest of the tissue, however since a breast is pretty much made of tissue, fat and glands this is not a bad thing.

This is a huge load off my mind. Some of the tension is still working on leaking away, but most is already gone. Dr. S was a wonderful doctor too, and what makes me feel even better is that she says from now on I don't have to go to 3 exams before seeing her. If I can do my own checks and I notice areas that feel like frozen peas (she says broccoli is okay, but frozen peas get checked) I can just go right in and see her and get the ultrasound right away. This really makes me feel better. I have no intension of ever taking her up on this offer if I don't have to, and I won't run in for any little thing, but if something really worries me I'm really happy to know I can find out what it is right away.

So thats it on this issue. Thank goodness its over!!!

My doctors appointment went fine. The lump has not changed so I have been referred to see a specialist and most likely get an ultrasound done to try and find out what this is.

Some amount of immediate stress is gone, at least in the anticipation stress I was feeling in going to the doctor today. However I'm still stuck in that trap of everything being unknown and some part of me not really wanting to know (that whole no news can't be bad news syndrome).

Anyway, thats the update and the saga goes on. Its a happy Nym (my kitty) day though, she is keeping me company while Kevin works his little tush off!!

Tonight I took my first intermediate class at St. Stephen's Green Ceili dancing. It was fun, confusing but fun and I'm feeling good about my dancing progress. It was a good dancing evening though I didn't take too many pictures. Kevin was able to come for a little bit. I really do miss dancing with him; he has been too busy the last few weeks to go dancing much. Overall a good night!

Home now winding down from the evening. Weighing heavily on my mind right now is tomorrows doctors appointment. This will be my third breast exam in less than two months (if you don't know the story you can read it here).

I'm not sure what I think or feel about any of this anymore. Its not the worst it could be, it might be nothing, or something mild which could still call for removal. Who knows at this point, all that I do know is that I'm a ball of nerves. Not knowing is killing me as much as the possibility of knowing. Weird I know - but true. Anyway, tomorrow I see the doc again and we will see what happens.

I have to note how thankful I am for Kevin. When I spaz-out about one thing when this is really what bothers me, he figure it out and forgives me and holds me. He's also going with me tomorrow, he will mostly just be waiting for me, but just knowing a friendly face will be there after is one less worry.

In any case thank you to everyone who helped me learn new dances tonight; And wish me luck tomorrow.

I spent the evening last night in the best way possible: having a pajama party with my best friend!!

Kevin came home from work around 11 and I was already tired, but rather than being pathetic and going to bed we pulled out the futon, got into our pjs, put in Joe Versus the Volcano and muched at some Ben and Jerry's special core filled ice cream.

It was wonderful. By the end I was half asleep, but besides just cuddling and laughing and such we would wiggle dance when Tom Hanks was dancing on the screen, and pretended we had our own typhoon on the little raft of the futon. I love the playfulness - I love pajama parties with my best friend!

This seems to be the topic of day in blogs I read. And its important so I feel the need to comment.

I am Pro-Choice because no one should be able to tell me what I can and can't do with my body. But besides that different situations call for different actions.

For example my friend DM recently made a post in her live journal about 3 women she knows (I know two of them); this is the short version of her post, but her long version is so so worth reading.

Woman 1: Recently had a baby at age 20. Is a very strict believer of all catholic practices and so never gave a thought to abortion. She dropped out of college, her parents took out a second mortgage. Her husband to be owns his own mortgage company and barely makes any money, so she and the baby are on welfare. She had planned to go back to school in a year, but it doesn’t' look like it will be possible till the baby is in school, if then. They are planning to be married in May, but he makes excuses to say at work and she plays the house wife but sneaks in a drink here and there. And this poor baby though she has parents who love her also has parents who resent the life they are now forced to live.

Woman 2: Had a child who is the joy of her life. Her second child is being induced tomorrow and everyone is excited and happy. Her first child is healthy and happy. They may not be a perfect family, but it’s a good life.

Woman 3: Recently had an abortion. It was a hard decision and against her catholic upbringing; however she and her boyfriend discussed it rationally and decided it was the best thing. They didn’t believe it was something they were mentally or emotionally prepared to deal with. However she can never tell her mother because she would never have approved. She knows it was the right decision for her to make, but it was a very very hard one. She went through the procedure quite well and is going to be quite healthy.

Three women, three circumstances. Whether they made the right decisions can't really be judged. I don't think woman 1 did, but that is my point of view and may not be right. The point is that these three women are examples of the right to choose that they have as US citizens.

Blacksheep also posted today about abortion; this time about laws. The senate has now ruled to recognize "a fetus as a separate victim in cases involving pregnant women". This may not be a ruling to outlaw abortion but this will be used in cases to support the outlawing of abortion.

Abortion isn't right for everyone, but we live in a country that was created so its people could choose what they want to believe and practice. This should count for our bodies as well as our minds.

While Kevin was in the eye doctor I did some photo wandering around the Berkeley campus. I found some beautiful flowers to photograph on a bridge near faculty glade. As I was photographing two men came onto the bridge and began setting up equipment. I was about to move on when I realized these men were setting up photography equipment. So I stopped to talk to them.

I ended up spending about 45 minutes chatting with freelance photographersEdward Caldwell and Jed Manwaring; asking questions about their equipment and backgrounds. Jed told me about Better Photo.com which is a website that gives all sorts of tips to beginners as well as offering classes online. Kevin and I are both considering taking a class.

Both guys were really nice and really helpful and wonderful. Their photography is wonderful and if nothing else comes of it, I really loved just talking to them. However I made one request of them: Both men were happy to offer me their email and agreed that if I sent then a couple of photos they would be happy to give me some feedback. I'm so excited! I promised I wouldn't pester them; I would just send them my photos.

So now I'm trying to decide what photos I want to send to them. I'm working on sorting through all my photos and narrowing it down, but if you have an opinion please let me know!!

So the question is, of all the photos I have up on In Pictures, which ones should be critiqued?